We've Never Been Here Before Lesson One: Asking for Help

1 day ago
4 min read

Epilogue

Life doesn't come with a lesson plan. Some seasons ask us to trust before we understand, to begin before we feel ready, and to grow in ways we never expected. This is one of those seasons.

I almost titled this first post Packing Up and Leaving. Because that's exactly what I've been doing.

Packing boxes.

Selling furniture.

Cleaning out closets.

Preparing to leave Memphis for Boston.

But the more I sat with it, the more I realized this story isn't really about moving. It's about becoming.

When the idea for this series first came to me, I thought We've Never Been Here Before was about Boston, graduate school, or starting this next chapter at 50. Then I caught myself.

The truth is...

I have done this before.

I've moved before.

I've started over before.

I've had to begin again more than once.

So why does this feel so different?

Because life has been lifing.

The last few months have been full. Family responsibilities. Packing. Preparing for graduate school. Leaving a city that has shaped me. Saying goodbye to people I love while trying to make space for what's ahead.

Some days I was excited.

Some days I was overwhelmed.

Some days I just sat in the middle of my apartment surrounded by boxes wondering how everything was going to get done.

And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I slipped into a role I've played for years.

The strong friend.

The one who figures it out.

The one who carries the load.

The one who tells everyone else, "I've got it."

The Pivot

Then God stepped in.

Not with fireworks.

Not with some dramatic miracle.

He simply slowed everything down.

My flight changed from Wednesday to Friday, giving me time I didn't even know I needed.

Friends started buying me lunch.

People offered to help me sell furniture.

Others showed up to help me pack, clean out my apartment, move boxes, check on me, or simply ask, "What do you need?"

At first, I wanted to say, "I'm good."

Then I realized...

Maybe I wasn't.

Maybe I really did need help.

And in the moments when I felt the loneliest, I discovered something I almost missed.

I wasn't alone.

Being the Receiver

Maybe We've Never Been Here Before isn't about Boston after all.

Maybe it's about learning how to receive.

Learning to ask,

"Could you help me?"

"Would you mind?"

"I need you."

Those words haven't always come naturally.

I've spent so much of my life helping others that I forgot allowing people to help me is a gift, too.

This season is teaching me that strength isn't measured by how much I can carry by myself.

Sometimes strength is letting someone else carry a box.

Buying you lunch.

Helping you clean.

Offering you a ride.

Saying a prayer for you.

Or simply reminding you that you're loved.

Allowing Things to Happen

So maybe We've Never Been Here Before isn't about a place.

Maybe it's about becoming someone I've never been before.

Someone who trusts a little deeper.

Someone who receives with gratitude instead of guilt.

Someone who understands that community isn't built only by showing up for others.

It's also built by allowing others to show up for you.

If you're reading this, thank you for joining me on this journey.

Over the coming months, I'll share lessons from Boston, Harvard, travel, faith, friendship, family, purpose, and the unexpected moments that remind us we're all learning as we go.

Because no matter our age, life has a way of introducing us to seasons we've never experienced before.

And that's okay.

We'll learn together.

💭 Reflection

What season of your life feels unfamiliar right now?

What is it asking you to learn?

📝 Homework

This week, ask for help.

Not because you can't do it yourself.

Because you were never meant to do everything by yourself.

Pause before saying, "I'm fine."

Instead, simply say, "Thank you."

💬 Share Out

I'd love to hear from you.

When was the last time you asked for help?

Was it easy, or did it stretch you?

If this lesson made you think about someone who is always the "strong one," share this post with them. It might be the permission they need to let someone show up for them.

Until next time, keep learning, keep growing, and remember... we've never been here before.

Benita C. Gordon is an educator of more than 25 years, leading classrooms, launching schools, and innovating through microschools. We cheer her on as she enters the Harvard Graduate School of Education to earn her Master's Degree in Educational Leadership, Organizations, & Entrepreneurship, and we look forward to great things ahead! This piece was originally posted July 25, 2026 and is cross-posted here with permission. You can reach out to Benita here.